70 x 7 = forgiveness

Then Peter came to Him and said, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven…”  – Matthew 18:21-22

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“…and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us…”

it rolls off of the tongue like elemenohpee,

without a pause, without a breath, without any consideration of what it really means.

what it really means to forgive,

simultaneously engulfed in what it means to be forgiven,

his mercy knows no bounds and his grace knows no limit.

yet my mind keeps score of all your wrongs,

my heart hardens at the sound of names that have now become synonymous with pain,

my soul longs for vengeance, or karma, or something in between,

just the thought of you suffering brings pleasure to my mind,

i can’t forgive you for your trespasses but lord please forgive me for mine.

i see more double standards in my logic than a feminist sees in the workplace,

but if to forgive is to let go,

would it not be easier to do so? to let go of the pain and hurt,

because…to let go is to be free,

so on second thought, i forgive you for your trespasses as the father forgives me.

 

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